Reasonable Interest in  General   

I want to know how Bernard Shaw
Likes beefsteak—fairly done, or raw?
I want to know what kinds of shoes
M. Maeterlinck and Howells use.

I have great curiosity
Regarding George Ade’s new boot tree.
Has Carolyn Wells of late employed
Hairpins of wire or celluliod?

What kind of soap does London like?
Does Robert Chambers ever “hike”?
Or did he ever? Or, if not,
Does he like cabbage, cheese, or what?

I want to know the size of gloves
Oppenheim wears, and if he loves
Olives, and how his clothes are made.
What does he eat? How is he paid?

All sorts of things I want to learn,
That are not of the least concern
To any one. For, Oh! and Oh!
I want to know! I WANT TO KNOW!

I want to know, and know I will—
The printing press is never still,
For me it prints such facts as these!
I am the Public, if you please!

By Ellis Parker Butler

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Other poems by Ellis Parker Butler:

• A Culinary Puzzle
• A Lost Angel
• A Minute
• A Pastoral
• A Question
• A Satisfactory Reform
• A Scotchman Whose Name Was Isbister
• A St. Valentine’s Day Tragedy
• An Old-Fashioned Garden
• Anticipation
• At Variance
• Bird Nesting
• Circumstantial Evidence
• Cupid Caught Napping
• Djolan
• Golden Silence
• Good - Better - Best
• How’d You Like It?
• Immortality
• Judgment Day
• Little Ballads Of Timely Warning; II: On Malicious
• Little Ballads Of Timely Warning; III: On Laziness
• Mary Had A Little Frog
• Merry Christmas And Happy New Year!
• Millennium
• Mouths Of Hippopotami And Some Recent Novels
• Night In The City
• No Beer, No Work
• October
• Outbid
• Partners
• Reasonable Interest
• Ridden Down
• Says Mister Doojabs
• Song For Heroes
• Speaking Of Operations
• The Ballad Of A Bachelor
• The Ballade Of The Automobile
• The Charge of the Second Iowa Cavalry
• The Daughter Of The Year
• The Final Tax
• The Golf Walk
• The Hunter
• The Poor Boy’s Christmas
• The Rich Boy’s Christmas
• The Romance Of Patrolman Casey
• The Sheep
• The Tearful Tale Of Captain Dan
• The Twenty Hoss-Power Shay
• The Water Nymphs
• The Whale
• The Wood Nymph
• To Jessica, Gone Back To The City
• To Kate. (In Lieu Of A Valentine)
• To Marguerite
• To May
• To Phyllis And May
• Valentine To The Girl In Black
• Western
• When Ida Puts Her Armor On
• Why I Went To The Foot
• Why Washington Retreated
• Womanly Qualms
• Would You Believe It?